Jirones en el tintero

"No hay que escribir si no en el momento en que cada vez que mojas la pluma en la tinta, un jirón de tu carne queda en el tintero" (TOLSTOI)

Ir a La Hipocondria

Jirones 22 de octubre de 2011
Tiempo de lectura:5 min., 8 seg.
Estaba claro: había olvidado respirar durante la noche, así que se murió.
Puede parecer increíble que a alguien se le olvide respirar, pero en él era un rasgo de carácter. Siempre había sido muy olvidadizo, y con la edad todo ello se había ido acrecentando hasta límites casi esperpénticos; puede decirse que se fue a la tumba a causa de uno de sus olvidos, y que de haberse tenido que ocupar él mismo de llevarse al catafalco se hubiera descompuesto en su cama… Claro que también cabía la posibilidad de que olvidase que estaba muerto y se pusiese a caminar por ahí como si nada. Por eso la gente que le conocía se apresuró a enterrarlo.
Encarnita, la mujer que le limpiaba la casa y se encargaba de él, fue quien más lo sintió. Se había llegado a acostumbrar a cuidar de todos y cada uno de sus pasos. Ella se encargaba todas las tardes de colocarle dos despertadores a ambos lados de la cama para despertarlo; ella colocaba su ropa en el cuarto de aseo para que no olvidase vestirse después de ducharse; ella había colocado un póster enorme en el techo de su dormitorio, sobre la cama, con la foto de una ducha; luego otro en el baño con un gran bollo con manteca y una taza de café humeante, junto con unas flechas en la pared que le llevaban hasta la cocina, donde ella le esperaba, puntualmente, con el desayuno caliente cada mañana…
Era como un niño pequeño con treinta y cinco años, y era consciente de ello…, pero lo olvidaba.
Su vida, aunque él no lo recordase, era como un gran puzzle que haces una y otra vez hasta que llegas a montarlo con la misma facilidad con que su constructor lo desmonta para venderlo; había llegado a vivir como un autómata: se levantaba mirando al techo, entonces recordaba que tenía que asearse, ducharse, afeitarse…; tras tomar la ducha, siempre se topaba con la ropa colgada de una percha, y tras ella un tremendo cartel que le decía que tras vestirse tocaba desayunar, así que seguía las flechas de la pared para llegar a la cocina, donde Encarnita le esperaba con su amplia sonrisa y sus ojos escrutadores que se encargaban de inspeccionar que no se había olvidado abrocharse la camisa o subirse la cremallera o ponerse los calcetines o los zapatos… Entonces desayunaba, y Encarnita le recordaba que tenía que ir a trabajar (trabajaba vigilando una sala de un museo hasta que su jefe fue consciente de sus olvidos, así que decidió, para no echarlo a la calle, mandarlo a vigilar un cuadro que tenía en su despacho; un cuadro de una señora gorda y con bigote con un inmenso collar en el cuello y cara de pocos amigos: su mujer seguramente); cuando salía de trabajar Encarnita se encargaba de mandarle un taxi (siempre con el mismo taxista, que lo conocía desde que era joven) para que lo llevara a casa de vuelta.
Porque el día que salió de trabajar antes de la hora prevista tuvieron que avisar a la policía para que, con helicópteros y furgonetas con su rostro y espejos a los lados, lo buscaran por toda la ciudad. Tardaron siete horas en dar con él, vagando por las calles del centro urbano, metiendo las llaves en todas las cerraduras que encontraba a su paso.
Sin embargo, y a pesar de todo, él era feliz. Había conseguido aceptarse tal y como era (aunque tal vez podía aceptarse porque no recordaba exactamente cómo era…), y su vida era tranquila y sosegada.
Lo olvidaba todo, eso era cierto, pero sabía perfectamente quiénes eran sus amigos. Ellos también se habían acostumbrado a saludarle por la calle y que él no recordase sus nombres. Se habían acostumbrado a citarse con él y que no se presentase, porque, en el fondo, era un buen hombre. Un hombre que, a menudo, no recordaba en qué dirección quedaba su casa o cuál era su horario de salida en el trabajo; ni siquiera recordaba, a menudo, qué días eran laborables y cuáles no. Pero qué importancia puede tener eso cuando se es amable y honesto…
Aquella noche, como una etapa más en su vida, había olvidado respirar. Pero lo hizo con naturalidad, como siempre lo había hecho. Con una inmensa y sincera sonrisa en los labios; como pidiendo perdón por ser feliz en este mundo hipócrita y vacío.
Lo encontraron sobre su cama, vestido aún, lleno de post-its por todos lados: esos papelitos que se pegan por un extremo y sirven para recordar cosas. Pero claro, los suyos estaban sin escribir…

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